OK, I know this has gone around before, but I got this recently and had to post it because it makes me laugh.
Dear Tech Support:
Recently I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slowdown in the overall performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and automatically installed undesirable programs such as Football 5.0 and TV 3.0. Now Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?
Signed, Desperate
Dear Desperate:First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. At the command line, try entering C:>>ITHOUGHTYOULOVEDME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0.If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to GrumpySilence 2.5, HappyHour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will flood you with SnoringLoudly.wav files.Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or re-install another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0. In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 6.9.
Good luck,Tech Support
So, yesterday they announced the PFD(Permanent Fund Dividend) amount- $1,654. Yes! For those who don't know what a PFD is, I'll give you the short of it: PFD=Free Money= I Love Alaska. Every man, woman and child is eligible who has been a resident of Alaska for at least one year. Needless to say, come October 3rd, Wal-Mart will be overflowing.
We, however, will be putting ours towards:
- New tires for the Pathfinder
-Spending money for Mexico
- Reserve account to help pay our land mortgage
-Paying off our credit card
- And, oh yeah, fixing our garage door that just BROKE today! Darn't!
18 comments:
what the heck? seriously? you get paid to live there? is that for real? I am in shock! that is way cool! so do you and your husband and jack each get that amount?
HAPPY DAY!
funny comment about Walmart.. so true! sounds like you have some great ways to spend it!
It still wouldn't be worth it to live in Alaska!
Anon-
Maybe thats why some people use their dividends to go to Hawaii each year.;)
Lauralee-
Its actually revenue from the state taxing the heck out of the oil companies- but yes, we get 3 this year.
i wish i got paid to live in AZ!
That's awesome. I wish we got that for living in Nevada lol. We should get something for living in the freakin desert. lol.
Sounds like a good plan to me! I wish we where paid to live in sunny Arizona!
oh that is sooooo awesome.. maybe we should consider a move!:)
Ah yes...Free money for living in a beautiful place!!! That's awesome! I adore Alaska... in the summer that is.We spent a vacation up there for 10 days in july and I never wanted to leave!
hey Laura... do you mind if I link you?
Get paid to live in Alaska. I am moving :)!!!!
It's no Hyrum. H-town on the map suckas!!! Love ya Laura.
Love the tech support. My high tech computer savy in laws would love it just as much!
I'm really need to visit Alaska! Who wouldn't want free money? Cha-ching!
WHAT? I'm moving to alaska! How cool is that!
love it, getting paid to live somewhere...maybe i'll move up there with my kids. :)
EMAIL me your home address. I lost it!!!!!!!
This is so cool - - I had no idea until we had some friends move to Alaska after grad school...lucky!!!
So jealous of the free money. I could use it.
I loved the Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 joke. So funny!
wow - love the free money! What a great benefit for living in such a beautiful place!
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